At The End of August... in Alaska!

Wow!!

Let me say that again...

Wow!!

That's how i can describe Alaska. It's such a beautiful place, and i've seen some amazing sights during the past few weeks, but there've been two instances today that have left me in total awe... but why should i tell you about that now!? I'll delay it and recap on what went before... because i'm nice like that, and love building suspense!!

So, i left you in LA at the whackiest hostel in the world with the craziest owner in the entire world! ''Yes Sir!!'' he'd constantly say. A bit of a legend, if not a little bit nuts. I got out of the hostel at stupid o'clock in the morning to rock it down to the Greyhound to catch my 5am bus to San Francisco. Journey was standard - a very short 8 hour trip (that really is NOTHING compared to what i've been doing!) Also rolled over the Golden Gate Bridge and saw Alkatraz on my way over - a little glimpse into what's coming next (i'm stopping in SF for 2 nights upon my return from Alaska).

Then decided to get to the airport a whole 4 hours early - i had to pay $15 to check my luggage in!! Un-bloody-believable!! Not like home is it?! Anyway, i caught my flight yadda yadda yadda. No sign of joining the mile-high club (still glad i refrained on the way back from Tenerife with the air-hostess who was chatting me up - and folks who didn't come to Tenerife with me... well, you can believe she was stunning, as you know no different! Ha!), despite my best pre-flight chatting skills with a group of girls. At least they were cool to chat to!

Rocked up at my hostel at a little past 1am, after crossing ANOTHER timezone, and crashed out in my dorm with some other dude who was yet again molesting a pig (what's with the beastiality over here?!). I was so close to giving him a broken glass colonic it's not even funny. I'd have jammed it so far up he'd have not dared to even pass the slightest bit of wind incase it ruptured his colon... seriously... i can't stand snoring!!

ANYWAY (don't worry, i'm finally going to say something useful), today i got my first taste of Alaska. Literally. Where else can you wake up and have reindeer for breakfast?? Sorry kids, but Santa's not coming this Christmas as i'm too busy munching on rudolph's leg. Mind you... do those reindeer NEED legs?? They fly, so technically they don't need to walk. Perhaps 'Rudolph the Parapalegic, Red Nose Reindeer' is the way to go, though i think those extra words would bugger up all those Christmas songs a bit wouldn't they!? And lots of kids would probably cry... but it IS PC that the reindeer encompass those with disabilities! Ha!

I woke up early and hired myself a bike and set out about Alaska. I can't tell you how good it feels to do some strenuous exercise again. My ass feels like i've been at a pool party with Michael Barrymore because the saddle was intent on sodomising me (this is despite my protestations in an earlier blog entry about sodomy... i still got it... it always gets you sometime, regrettably). Anyway, after getting lost for an hour in Alaska (it had to happen) i finally hit the coastal trail and came across my first 'wow' moment - across a giant still lake you could see the snow-capped mountains rising on the other side, so the lake acted like a giant mirror. Words cannot describe how tranquil and beautiful this moment was. It left me on a bit of a high for sure!

Spent the remainder of the day in Anchorage town (about a 5 mile bikeride away, though i did 10 miles after going completely the WRONG way), which was awesome. Just taking in the atmosphere and eating local stuff - it's so good to eat GOOD food (in this case, fresh halibut from the bay) as opposed to the crap that i've been eating the past 48 hours due to travelling non-stop.

Just this minute got back from my bike ride, and let me just say that the journey back was eventful... not just because my rear felt totally abused, but because i almost rode my bike RIGHT into a moose. Yes, a MOOSE!! I was too busy concentrating on my rectal pain, so when i looked up i saw this huge moose staring at me!! WOW!! Had it been a bear i'd have soiled myself with excitement and fear... but instead it was just excitement (it was a female - so she wouldn't kick my ass!). It's one of those moments where words cannot do the moment justice. Tomorrow i'm off to Seward to go whale-watching - god i hope i have a similar encounter!! I would be out to see wild grizzlies, but it's $500 to do it, which despite the exchange rate, i can't justify to myself, especially when i've got Yellowstone National Park in just over a week, which'll be bear-country too. Hopefully it'll be cheaper there!!

Also, gotta pass comment on the weather - simply because it's unlike what i've been enduring previously! Vegas was hotter than Satan's armpit in the middle of summer, but Alaska is just like home: wet and cool. Sweet! As ever, i think it's apt for me to comment on the women of Alaska too, as i've seemingly (unknowingly) been commenting on them in every state... hell, i'm a red-blooded guy - i have to comment don't i?? Simply, they're awesome too. Except for the 6'5'' Amazonian beasts i occasionally see - they're blatently wood cutters ha! Lots of 'scene' girls (some of you know what that means, some don't, but should you know what it means, you probably know that i have a bit of a niche for them... and daaaaaayyyyymmmmnnn are they hot (god, why have i picked up that goddam drawly expression from Vegas?! WHY?!)), so that's pretty cool!

So, what else is there to report?? Probably very little, and simultaneously loads. I always have brainwaves about what i've forgotten after i fill a blog up. And boy do i fill em!! More than that black dude at Muscle Beach filled those speedos!

I can definitely say that this whole experience has really made an impact on me - i've seen things i'd always dreamt about (not just Californian women) and done so many things... It's a bit gutting when i think that in a little over two weeks the dream'll be over - and i'll be back in the UK. I'm a little sad about that. Also sad to see Hannerz go, as we were dominating Vegas, and i really enjoyed having company - i extend this to Sarah, Sarah and Louise, should they be reading this too - it's been refreshing to hang with awesome, like-minded people, as opposed to the isolation that was Texas, and some of the crazed folks that inhabit the Southern Greyhounds!! Can definitely say that i've made some good mates here - David in NOLA (and Allan and Mike too) and my Hollywood buds... who knows what Alaska's going to bring... more laughs?? I hope so. More mates?? I really hope so too. I'm a social animal!!!

So... on that note, i'm going to leave y'all for now. Gonna get a good night's sleep tonight, as i'm up at 5.30am to get over to Seward to see the whales (i hope), and i won't be back 'til 10pm - so a loooong day ahead, but it should rule.

I might make another post and enrich your lives before i leave Alaska... but i might just wait until San Francisco on Tuesday. Guess you'll have to keep checking then right?? And commenting?? Ace, glad you agree.

Speak soon everyone, and as every - i love y'all!

Aaron! x